Lately, I have been very raw and sensitive and emotionally reactive. Being that way comes with effects, which include being oversensitive to damaging others. Things like feeling really gutted for days if I unintentionally hurt someones feelings, and digging too hard into myself to look for subconscious sinister motivation, when I forget or misconstrue boundaries… Continue reading #hotline
Tag: progress
#triggerwarning #mentalhealth
#triggerwarning #mentalhealth I’ve been struggling badly with my mental health since last fall. It’s been pretty awful in general, and then the small shred of resource and sanity I felt I had — my van/house/freedom — did what vanhousefreedom things do when they have 204,000 miles on them, and started breaking things. Expensive things. While… Continue reading #triggerwarning #mentalhealth
Thanks for giving: a shit.
Third rockin’ass orgasm of the day. Enjoying the hell out of my solo day-long water fast. Fuck your oppressive shitass holidays. — https://instagram.com/p/BNNjpf5hffd/ Water fasting as of midnight last night. Had no idea when I decided to do this a year ago, take the next step in personally divesting from the lies and the cognitive… Continue reading Thanks for giving: a shit.
I think.
If love is wishing for others what you would wish for yourself, if it is protecting others how you would protect yourself, then love is what I am likely to give in most of my moments, and what I have regarded most with in the past. If do unto others is the basis of love,… Continue reading I think.
Serendipitous gifts
“The role of the artist is exactly the same as the role of the lover. If I love you, I have to make you conscious of the things you don’t see.” James Baldwin Just now, I texted everyone I have a current iMessage conversation with “Thank you for being human with me”. It is because… Continue reading Serendipitous gifts
ROAD UPDATE: Fort Walton Beach
Originally posted to my Patrons at https://www.patreon.com/posts/4470079 Right now I am hanging out in the van with the side door open, out of the wind but in the sun from my waist down. The temperature is perfect like this, mid 60’s and cloudless, and I still have lots of time left in my day to… Continue reading ROAD UPDATE: Fort Walton Beach
ROAD UPDATE: Pensacola
Originally posted to my Patreon community at https://www.patreon.com/posts/4413008 Mississippi: OH EM GEE you’re heeeeere omg yay! Here, have a welcome center with all kinda free camping with picnic benches and spigots and shit and a FUCKING NASA SPACE CENTER!! Alabama: Fuck you. Welcome center closed. Florida: Fuck you. Show us your vegetables. Then welcome center,… Continue reading ROAD UPDATE: Pensacola
Belonging
I used to think I would never find a place I belonged. The lonliness filled me to the point that for a long time I didn’t even have the energy to wander anymore, looking for it, literally or figuratively. I’d talk myself out of going anywhere I felt I might find my place before the… Continue reading Belonging
ANNIVERSARY: Name Day
Simultaneously like yesterday, yet longer ago than it seems, I was about two months into Year of the Nee, my official year of celibacy and no intoxicants. I’d come to embark upon that decision in large part due to my romantic relationships and the patterns I had seen in them, one of those patterns being… Continue reading ANNIVERSARY: Name Day
bobbing cork in a bucket
On one hand, my ‘fuck the bucket’ epiphany (and artistic ritual) was really valuable to align myself with a deeper knowledge. Taking into account that myself, crabs who snip at my heels, and the crabs whose heels I am compelled to snip, were never meant to be in a fucking bucket in the first place… Continue reading bobbing cork in a bucket