I’ve been observably manic since last week, and my appointment with my social worker was canceled this week. I’ve fallen into the online social justice trap after a successful march on Sunday where I stepped into the opportunity to utilize my skills and street medic, expecting that I would have the aftercare of a therapy… Continue reading Brought to you by Instagram
Tag: insecurity
WIP: I Hate The Fucking Internet Today
I’m working on a maxi-single for I Hate The Fucking Internet Today while simultaneously fleshing out the lyrics (WIP = Work In Progress, afterall). It will be 5 songs I think, 4 of them versions of this one, and I think I’m gonna tack on What Kind Of Asshole Are You. I have a fast/cute… Continue reading WIP: I Hate The Fucking Internet Today
#triggerwarning #mentalhealth
#triggerwarning #mentalhealth I’ve been struggling badly with my mental health since last fall. It’s been pretty awful in general, and then the small shred of resource and sanity I felt I had — my van/house/freedom — did what vanhousefreedom things do when they have 204,000 miles on them, and started breaking things. Expensive things. While… Continue reading #triggerwarning #mentalhealth
Corners Turned
It’s too early to tell precisely. But I suspect I may have stumbled onto something I’d like to do for a while, which helps me to feel less powerless in the world, gets me outside, teaches me to grow food, teaches me about land preservation, restoration, and conservation, shows me how to effectively irrigate using… Continue reading Corners Turned
EMFUCKINGBODIED
I swear I just saw myself for the first time I told myself in the mirror As I cried after connecting so incredibly profoundly with multiple people (And once again meeting another incredible man I can’t have in my life like I would prefer, god damn stupid growth opportunities) “You are.. An amazing woman. And… Continue reading EMFUCKINGBODIED
Solidarity
I had a get last night. A pretty big one. A few of them really, but one in particular that brought about a bit of an ‘ugh’ along with the ‘ah ha!’. It came about while reading the rather surprisingly amazing comments on this post, about a female artist who creates a series of self… Continue reading Solidarity
Untitled
“I know that love is unconditional. But I also know that it can be unpredictable, unexpected, uncontrollable, unbearable and strangely easy to mistake for loathing” – Neil Gaiman, Stardust
If London is a watercolor, New York is an oil painting.
“For in that city there is neurosis in the air which the inhabitants mistake for energy.” ― Evelyn Waugh The New York subway has its own distinctive scent, like a cocktail of black tar and metal shavings, that I immediately find familiar and comforting every time I retun. You’d think it would mostly smell like… Continue reading If London is a watercolor, New York is an oil painting.
The present past
I’m conflicted about publishing this. It’s long been hidden in the drafts section of neevita, offline since phuqed.org slipped quietly into the night, like most of the stuff I wrote about back then. There are rape triggers and erotic elements. It’s difficult subject matter and I expect that isn’t limited to how I am reacting… Continue reading The present past
Thrashing
I feel like I’m thrashing around emotionally, after emerging from a long stretch of intense computer-focused work. In the last month, including my massage, teaching and metrix jobs, I’ve released three albums (Autochthon, Embodied, and Embodied Limited Edition), finished 95% of a DVD, all with cover art and sound mixing/video editing that I’ve done, and… Continue reading Thrashing