Archive for the ‘OPC’ Category

Saturday, August 27th, 2016

“I’m not sad, but the boys who are looking for sad girls always find me. I’m not a girl anymore and I’m not sad anymore. You want me to be a tragic backdrop so that you can appear to be illuminated, so that people can say ‘Wow, isn’t he so terribly brave to love a girl who is so obviously sad?’ You think I’ll be the dark sky so you can be the star? I’ll swallow you whole.” — Warsan Shire

Tuesday, March 8th, 2016

I am astounded by the number of people I talk with who honestly believe that the road to ‘all one’ equality doesn’t necessitate the work of actually acknowleding and addressing the ways in which our societal structures have created unequal circumstances.

Saturday, November 7th, 2015

“When we speak we are afraid our words will not be heard or welcomed. But when we are silent, we are still afraid. So it is better to speak.” — Audre Lorde

Sunday, October 18th, 2015

“Letting go of a relationship is letting go of a form. It occurs when the love that you are cannot be expressed in the container of the relationship, in the form that it is in. For as your heart has continued to grow and expand, you may find that the current form of your relationship does not allow you to express all the love that you are. When this happens, your soul will find ways to free you, to help you build a new form. Wether it is you or the other person who physically draws away, it is always because the relationship has been a success and all the love that you can express has been expressed, and there now needs to be a new form for you to express all the love that you are now capable of giving. The purpose of every relationship is to open your heart, to allow you to become more loving to yourself and to others. Think now of how you have become more loving since you started this relationship… Congratulate yourself on the expansion of your heart, on your greater capacity to love. The ‘you’ that is even more open now, more loving, more kind, more gentle, more open, more understanding.” -Orin

Monday, October 12th, 2015

“If you want something badly enough, you make arrangements.
If you don’t want it badly enough, you make excuses.” — Hanif Kureishi

Monday, October 12th, 2015

“Twenty years ago, if you had told me I would be doing what I’m doing now I would have said you’re crazy. There is no way I would have believed you.

We each walk a path that is our own. It isn’t always pretty. It can be painful. Messy. Destructive. And we experience things that shape us for better or for worse. I fought my path tooth and nail for a good chunk of my life. I tried to fill it with things that hurt me. Because I was hurting. I made choices that hurt people. I made choices that hurt myself.

Like many out there, I’ve survived terrible things. Seen things I shouldn’t have. Witnessed atrocious behavior and didn’t speak up.

Somewhere along the way I decided that I wanted to be happy and live a life I could be proud of. I wanted more than being a martyr or victim or to suffer in silence. It was lonely and very difficult. Many times I wanted to give up. I don’t know how I made it sometimes.

Experiencing hardship and challenges is what makes many of us more compassionate and accepting. It did me. And it showed me what I didn’t want in my life.

In my culture we call this kind of idea “ciillanguarteq”. To become aware or conscious of the world around us. We have many awakenings like that in our lifetime. It’s up to us to choose how we process and use those awakenings. It’s up to us to continue to evolve or to fight them.

One of the things I promised myself when I was younger and experiencing hardship was that I would become adept at being able to do as much as I could. Enhance the definition of our Yup’ik word: “cavesratuli”-Somebody who knows how to work on everything. I promised myself I would become an expert in as many things and types of work as I could so I would never be without a job or a way to support myself. That desire came from having nothing.

Another thing I promised myself was I would constantly work at being a better person. Learn. Grow. Change. Because I knew that who I wanted to be wasn’t who I was. That’s the difficult part. It means you have to be able to look at yourself critically and see what needs work. You have to admit your weaknesses. To yourself. And sometimes to others. It means you make the things that don’t work in your life obsolete.

What’s really hard about that, is that sometimes…it means you’ll be alone. If you’ve ever changed while others around you stayed the same, you know it’s a lonely thing to do.

I’m glad I chose the things I did. Even the mistakes.” — Estelle Thomson

Sunday, October 11th, 2015

“It never ceases to amaze me how authors in this field write the wisdoms they most need to read. I write about groundedness, because I have an ungrounded tendency. Many write about being in the now, because they have a tendency to dissociate. Others write about the containment of the ego, because their egos have run amok. Still others write about embodiment, because they can’t get out of their heads. We are not great knowers. We are merely travel agents for the particular trip we need to go on” — Jeff Brown

As you start to walk on the way, the way appears. – Rumi

Sunday, October 11th, 2015

“Beware of people whose spiritual credentials come from “study.” Look to (don’t follow) the ones who are figuring it out through their experiences, not the experiences of others. These people are born leaders, who probably reject the role of leadership. These people know suffering. They know courage. They have seen battle and survived.

Look to the ones who say “I don’t know.” Look to the ones with the scars on their faces. Look to the limping, not the shiny and new. Don’t look to the gurus who got to the top of the mountain by helicopter. Look to the ones who are climbing, dirty and exhausted. They are the ones who know the value of the journey. They are the ones carving a stairway from which they cannot benefit.” — Alison Nappi

Sunday, October 11th, 2015

“You torment yourself wondering how they could not love your burning heart; the answer is, darling, you are not the star you thought you were. You are the fucking universe, and not everyone is an astronaut.”

Sunday, October 11th, 2015

“One cannot expect positive results from an educational or political action program which fails to respect the particular view of the world held by the people. Such a program constitutes cultural invasion, good intentions notwithstanding.” ― Paulo Freire, Pedagogy of the Oppressed

Friday, August 28th, 2015

“Someone can be madly in love with you and still not be ready. They can love you in a way you have never been loved and still not join you on the bridge. And whatever their reasons you must leave. Because you never ever have to inspire anyone to meet you on the bridge. You never ever have to convince someone to do the work to be ready. There is more extraordinary love, more love that you have never seen, out here in this wide and wild universe. And there is the love that will be ready.” ― Nayyirah Waheed

Friday, August 28th, 2015

“You don’t hate Mondays. You just hate being a slave.” — Gazi Kodzo

Friday, August 28th, 2015

“I am too intelligent, too demanding, and too resourceful for anyone to be able to take charge of me entirely. No one knows me or loves me completely. I have only myself” ― Simone de Beauvoir

Friday, July 24th, 2015

“She made broken look beautiful and strong look invincible. She walked with the universe on her shoulders and made it look like a pair of wings.” — Ariana

Tuesday, May 26th, 2015

“Colorful demonstrations and weekend marches are vital but alone are not powerful enough to stop wars. Wars will be stopped only when soldiers refuse to fight, when workers refuse to load weapons onto ships and aircraft, when people boycott the economic outposts of Empire that are strung across the globe. ” ― Arundhati Roy, Public Power in the Age of Empire

Twins

Sunday, May 3rd, 2015

“Do you believe in life after delivery?”

‘Why, of course. There has to be something after delivery. Maybe we are here to prepare ourselves for what we will be later.’

“Nonsense. There is no life after delivery. What kind of life would that be?”

‘I don’t know, but there will be more light than here. Maybe we will walk with our legs and eat from our mouths. Maybe we will have other senses that we can’t understand now.’

“That is absurd. Walking is impossible. And eating with our mouths? Ridiculous! The umbilical cord supplies nutrition and everything we need. But the umbilical cord is so short. Life after delivery is to be logically excluded.”

‘Well I think there is something and maybe it’s different than it is here. Maybe we won’t need this physical cord anymore.’

“Nonsense. And moreover if there is life, then why has no one has ever come back from there? Delivery is the end of life, and in the after-delivery there is nothing but darkness and silence and oblivion. It takes us nowhere.”

‘Well, I don’t know, but certainly we will meet Mother and she will take care of us.’

“Mother? You actually believe in Mother? That’s laughable. If Mother exists then where is She now?”

‘She is all around us. We are surrounded by her. We are of Her. It is in Her that we live. Without Her this world would not and could not exist.’

“Well I don’t see Her, so it is only logical that She doesn’t exist.”

‘Sometimes, when you’re in silence and you focus and you really listen, you can perceive Her presence, and you can hear Her loving voice, calling down from above.’

– Útmutató a Léleknek

Thursday, March 26th, 2015

“What if love never feels safe? What if it was never, ever meant to give you that? What if it comes spinning out of the stars offering something much more radical, creative, and transformative than safety?

What if it wasn’t safety that you were seeking after all, but wholeness and a wild sort of aliveness?

What if no matter how many profound insights you have, how many amazingly powerful awakening experiences you collect, or how convinced you become that you have it all together, that you will always be at risk for the beloved to step in and pull the rug out from underneath the conceptual?

What if it was never going to be like you thought it would?” — Matt Licata

Friday, March 6th, 2015

“Psychological patriarchy is the dynamic between those qualities deemed masculine and feminine in which half of our human traits are exalted while the other half is devalued. Both men and women participate in this tortured value system. Psychological patriarchy is a dance of contempt, a perverse form of connection that replaces true intimacy with complex, covert layers of dominance and submission, collusion and manipulation. It is the unacknowledged paradigm of relationships that has suffused Western civilization generation after generation, deforming both sexes, and destroying the passionate bond between them.” — Terrence Real

For Zita

Monday, February 23rd, 2015

New mix tape; revisiting the music I’ve performed to as Zita the Aerialist.

http://neevita.net/performance-gallery/

http://neevita.net/category/events/

Thank you, Zita. You saved my life.

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Sunday, February 22nd, 2015

“She buried her ears
into the calm
of his heartbeat
and in a matter of seconds
fell terribly in love
with the way
her loneliness fell
softly and suddenly
asleep
in his chest.”

–Christopher Poindexter

Monday, February 2nd, 2015

“Money is the biggest driver of illness in our human world. It’s gotten so bad that upper-class people do not have normal mammalian responses to others suffering.” -Mariamma Jones

Sunday, February 1st, 2015

“The evil was not in bread and circuses, per se, but in the willingness of the people to sell their rights as free men for full bellies and the excitement of the games which would serve to distract them from the other human hungers which bread and circuses can never appease.” – Admiral Ben Moreell

Quincy Blaque Trio: The Drunkening

Sunday, January 25th, 2015

This song causes me to rather desperately miss partner dancing. Which is its own kind of sick little twisted irony.

As quiet as a dead mouse
and as bored as a tick
And a thousand drinks later
We’ll take home anything that’s thick

Cause the secrets are dirty
As the heart is as pure
As the water is muddy
We gave up on a cure

Your punishments in heaven
Your rewards are in hell
There’s nothing you want that’s in between
As far as I can tell

Your smile is splenetic
Your blood’s like perfume
it’ll burn if you let it
we all own stock in this doom

You think you have to destroy me
To make us equal; guess what?
This thought just keeps rolling round my head
it’s beginning to suck

Compress this into little tiny pieces broken fixed and blinded vicious eyes that float ashore they don’t need them anymore
they lie
awake

Nothing can hurt me
except maybe pain
you’ll never convince me
of anything again.

Say Something

Saturday, January 10th, 2015

“Some are quick to use the crabs in a bucket trope, but it’s important to remember that crabs were never meant to be piled in a bucket.” – Ryan Dalton

Fuck your fucking bucket. Fuck your fucking fear. Fuck you for trying to keep me in it with you. Fuck you for trying to hold me down and stop me from climbing out. Fuck you for trying to erase me and minimize me and manipulate me away from my truth. Fuck you for giving me no other choice but to leave you behind.

Fuck you for not coming with me.

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Related: Rock Lobster: Finding Home.

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Tuesday, January 6th, 2015

“There are times when we have to stand for justice. And there are times that in standing for justice, we have to turn away from people that we would ordinarily want to be with. That is the difficult part of struggle.” – Bell Hooks